I recently bought a book on disciplining children between the ages 2 and 12 called "1-2-3 Magic" because I am finding it a challenge to raise my son who is going through the "terrible twos". Actually it started way before he hit 2. Anyway, I have read only 1/3 of the book but I found some very useful information and insights into how to discipline children with real life examples which I can identify with. I do not think Josiah is very different from other children his age. Sure, mealtimes are always a battle and he does the opposite of what he is told but aren't all boys like that?
One of the things discussed in the book which got me thinking is do we love and like our children? Of course we love our children. A mother and child's bond is one of the most intimate and begins from the time the child is conceived in the mother's womb. But do we necessarily like our children? Do we always enjoy their company? Does the screaming, yelling and crying get to us sometimes? Do we look forward to a break from them for a couple of days? I know I need a break. In fact I wish I could just take flight and journey to a faraway land and leave all my cares and worries behind. I feel as though I am onboard the Titanic and all the weight is pulling me downwards and I fear that I am sinking deeper and deeper until I take my final breath.
Saturday, 18 May 2013
Monday, 13 May 2013
Mother's Day 2013
Yesterday (12/05/2013) was Mother's Day. It is a day that I want to always remember and that is why I want to write it down lest I forget. I don't usually blog about negative, depressing or things that upset me. But this is an exception. Notice the word "Happy" is dropped from the title.
To start off, there was no celebration because I am still under confinement. Neither were there any surprises, flowers or even a card. But that's Okay because I have learnt not to expect anything. When you expect things and don't get them you, the only person who gets disappointed and crushed is yourself. So yes, I have realised that a long time ago.
I am told that when one is under confinement, one must not cry. Every tear drop is likened to a drop of blood. It is said that if you cry during confinement, you will become blind (Version 1) or you will have poor eyesight in the future (Version 2). Either one is bad news. But cried I did. A whole bucket load of tears. I cried for 3 hours. I cried and cried and cried until I might as well have used up my entire life's quota of tears until I had no more. But I was wrong I later found out because I cried again today.
The million dollar question is why I cried so much. I attribute it to a number of things but mainly its a build up of pent up emotions of sorts. I know that a tiny new baby brings so much joy. But it also comes with it a slew of not so joyful moments ie. exhaustion from round the clock attention that the baby demands: breast feeding, pumping, changing of diapers when baby poos - up to 10 times of poo a day, washing bottles, preparing milk, rocking baby to sleep when she is cranky and the list goes on. Only a mother who fully breastfeeds will understand. All this has made me sleep deprived. How I long for a straight 4 hours of uninterrupted sleep to rest my tired soul and body. I suppose I could take the easy way out and leave everything to the confinement lady and let her feed formula milk but I refuse to do this to my child. No matter how difficult it is I am bent on breastfeeding my children because it is the best for them. And my hard work has paid off because I have enough breastmilk to sustain Sophie.
Because of the exhaustion and sleep deprivation, I have become depressed (using this term loosely). What I really need is for hubby to empathise with me and show some appreciation. A simple "I may not understand completely what you are going through but I know it hasn't been easy. I want you to know I appreciate all that you are doing and Thank You for doing what you do!!" would have made me feel appreciated. Instead he does not spend time with me or Sophie choosing instead to watch TV and checking whatsapp all the time because he is part of various chat groups. He also promised to take care of Josiah but it has not relieved me of my duties, worries and stress. I have to wake them up in the mornings. He doesn't even clean him. School starts at 8.30am but they don't leave the house till 9am. Bedtime is 10pm but J ends up sleeping almost 11pm. This is irresponsible and really annoys me. If I had a crystal ball to foresee this I would not agree to have a second child. Again reminder to self - DO NOT MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE. It is pointless to have many children when your one and only husband is not supportive of you emotionally and physically. I say emotional and physical because hubby is not stingy financially. In fact he is quite generous and has never refused to give me money for the household and for our children. The downside to this is that he thinks money is the solution to most problems. A typical example is get a maid to do household chores which he thinks is beneath him. Few years back when we were living in the apartment, I asked him to help out with the household chores. We had a big fight. He suggested to get a maid. It was only the two of us back then mind you. He is the epitome of chauvinism. In fact child raising is entirely the responsibility of the mother. Now where would the both of you be if your father was not part of the equation?
I blame no one. It is the path that I have chosen and therefore I have to face the consequences and live with it. Perhaps I have been betrayed by my own youth and naievity. Yes it must be so. Barely 29 and I already have 2 children, many of my friends are still discovering themselves and all that the world has to offer. But I love my 2 children; whom I am so proud of and for which I thank God everyday.
To start off, there was no celebration because I am still under confinement. Neither were there any surprises, flowers or even a card. But that's Okay because I have learnt not to expect anything. When you expect things and don't get them you, the only person who gets disappointed and crushed is yourself. So yes, I have realised that a long time ago.
I am told that when one is under confinement, one must not cry. Every tear drop is likened to a drop of blood. It is said that if you cry during confinement, you will become blind (Version 1) or you will have poor eyesight in the future (Version 2). Either one is bad news. But cried I did. A whole bucket load of tears. I cried for 3 hours. I cried and cried and cried until I might as well have used up my entire life's quota of tears until I had no more. But I was wrong I later found out because I cried again today.
The million dollar question is why I cried so much. I attribute it to a number of things but mainly its a build up of pent up emotions of sorts. I know that a tiny new baby brings so much joy. But it also comes with it a slew of not so joyful moments ie. exhaustion from round the clock attention that the baby demands: breast feeding, pumping, changing of diapers when baby poos - up to 10 times of poo a day, washing bottles, preparing milk, rocking baby to sleep when she is cranky and the list goes on. Only a mother who fully breastfeeds will understand. All this has made me sleep deprived. How I long for a straight 4 hours of uninterrupted sleep to rest my tired soul and body. I suppose I could take the easy way out and leave everything to the confinement lady and let her feed formula milk but I refuse to do this to my child. No matter how difficult it is I am bent on breastfeeding my children because it is the best for them. And my hard work has paid off because I have enough breastmilk to sustain Sophie.
Because of the exhaustion and sleep deprivation, I have become depressed (using this term loosely). What I really need is for hubby to empathise with me and show some appreciation. A simple "I may not understand completely what you are going through but I know it hasn't been easy. I want you to know I appreciate all that you are doing and Thank You for doing what you do!!" would have made me feel appreciated. Instead he does not spend time with me or Sophie choosing instead to watch TV and checking whatsapp all the time because he is part of various chat groups. He also promised to take care of Josiah but it has not relieved me of my duties, worries and stress. I have to wake them up in the mornings. He doesn't even clean him. School starts at 8.30am but they don't leave the house till 9am. Bedtime is 10pm but J ends up sleeping almost 11pm. This is irresponsible and really annoys me. If I had a crystal ball to foresee this I would not agree to have a second child. Again reminder to self - DO NOT MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE. It is pointless to have many children when your one and only husband is not supportive of you emotionally and physically. I say emotional and physical because hubby is not stingy financially. In fact he is quite generous and has never refused to give me money for the household and for our children. The downside to this is that he thinks money is the solution to most problems. A typical example is get a maid to do household chores which he thinks is beneath him. Few years back when we were living in the apartment, I asked him to help out with the household chores. We had a big fight. He suggested to get a maid. It was only the two of us back then mind you. He is the epitome of chauvinism. In fact child raising is entirely the responsibility of the mother. Now where would the both of you be if your father was not part of the equation?
I blame no one. It is the path that I have chosen and therefore I have to face the consequences and live with it. Perhaps I have been betrayed by my own youth and naievity. Yes it must be so. Barely 29 and I already have 2 children, many of my friends are still discovering themselves and all that the world has to offer. But I love my 2 children; whom I am so proud of and for which I thank God everyday.
Friday, 10 May 2013
WELCOME TO THE WORLD SOPHIE GIRL!!!
This is an overdue post. And it is going to be a long one.
26/04/2013, Friday - you decided to make your grand entrance into the world. It all started the night before. There was a bit of bleeding and I felt tummy cramps and couldn't sleep. I dismissed the thought that I might go into labour because during check up with Dr N on Monday he said that you will not be born this week. However, there was "the show" on Friday morning so we decided to go see him at about 1pm after dropping Josiah at grandma's place. Imagine our surprise when Dr N told us that I was already 4cm dilated! So I was admitted into the labour room. The cardiotocograph aka CTG machine further revealed that I was already experiencing contractions though they were 10 minutes apart. Funnily, I didn't feel the contraction pain at all. I proudly announced to Daddy that I will not be needing any epidural this time. The last time I had epidural for Josiah and my labour lasted 17 hours! The epidural was really uncomfortable and I didn't think it really helped with easing the pain. Anyway, I have also been discussing with Daddy that I wanted to go sans epidural this time. After all, there are women who choose the natural route and abstain from any kind of painkiller.
Lo and behold, at about 2pm the contractions got stronger and quicker. Dr N decided to artificially break my water bag and it was not only uncomfortable but also painful. I started screaming. Dr N and Daddy suggested that I take the epidural as they didn't think I could handle the contractions which will get stronger when I approach delivery. I did not put up a fight. The contractions were really painful. I would rate it 8/10. I was already 6cm dilated. The midwife called for the anaesthesiologist to administer the epidural. Now, the epidural carries certain risks and poses some danger as the drug is injected into the spinal cord to numb the nerves from the back downwards. It must be very precise and the patient has to be very still. There is no room for error as any slip can result in paralysis. That is why I was made to sign a consent form prior to the epidural. Can you imagine how I have to endure the contraction pain and be still at the same time. But as I said, there is really no room for error. So I tried to be as still as possible. At that point of time, I was already digging into Daddy's flesh.
After the epidural and my requests to increase the dosage, the pain became somewhat bearable. At about 3pm the midwife checked my cervix and noted that I am fully dilated. She then called Dr N. Dr N arrived promptly and within a few minutes and after several pushes, you arrived at 3.16pm. We were overjoyed. Later I found out that it was a spontaneous vaginal delivery (SVD). Previously with Josiah, I had an assisted birth via vacuum. Daddy was there to witness your birth. He cut your umbilical cord. You weighed 3.1kg. Just the right size I'd say, not too big nor too small. Josiah was 2.98kg. You were so beautiful and perfect! I gave you a kiss on your cheek. The midwife then took you away to get cleaned. After about an hour later, you were brought to me to be breastfed. Your very first feed and you suckled so well! Po Po was there to see you too.
So the whole labour took about only 2 hours. I thank God for the quick and safe delivery.
Dr H then visited at about 6pm to report that you were doing fine after doing the necessary tests and routine examinations. Josiah also came to visit you but could only observe through the glass window. Everything seemed to be alright and your birth announcements were sent via sms, whatsapp and also on facebook. Daddy and Josiah were preparing to leave at about almost midnight when the nurse suddenly told Daddy that the paed on call wanted to speak to him. I felt a bit suspicious too as I was wondering why the nurses didn't bring you to me to be breastfed after the initial one at about 4pm. When Daddy returned, he told me that you turned bluish and you were breathless due to low oxygen levels. There was also mention of doing a heart examination as there is a heart murmur. In the meantime they gave you oxygen and continued monitoring your condition. Breastfeeding was out of the question as it would make you even more tired. Imagine how worried I was. This was a shock to me as Dr H had just reported that you were fine a few hours ago. I could not sleep the entire night. I also tried hand expressing colostrum/milk and then use a small syringe to suck it up so that they could give it to you through a tube. The amount that I got was so little even after an hour.
The next morning I waited for Dr H to make her rounds so that I could enquire on your condition. When she finally did her rounds, she told me that it is most likely an infection and they need to do blood tests and if need be, antibiotics to be given to you intravenously. To make matters worse, she is going on leave for a few days and another paed, Dr D will take over from her. I was puzzled as to how you could have gotten infected. Later in the day, Dr D told us that you were responding well to the antibiotics (the antibiotics is Rocephin by the way). We were reluctant to subject a newborn to antibiotics but I suppose we did not have a choice then. He also told me, to my dismay, that it is a 5 day course antibiotics and because it is given through IV, you will have to stay in the hospital until you finish the course.
There was no point for me to extend my stay, since I could not breastfeed you. I checked out of the hospital on 28/4/2014 but you had to stay until at least 1/5/2013. The IV on your hand and tube in your throat pained my heart so much. I visited you everyday for you to suckle on my breast as I had to express milk at home to keep the supply coming. Thank God your condition had also improved. You had jaundice too, so you were also given photolight treatment during your stay.
Meanwhile at home, I tried to express milk as often as possible. But it was the beginning of a very painful and sad process. No matter how hard I tried, even after 1 whole hour, I only got droplets of milk. Not even 1ml. My nipples were sore. I was so disappointed. I drank lots of fluid, black dates and ginger tea, nursing tea and various supplements but to no avail. This continued on for several days, even after you were discharged. I was on the brink of depression. I have always been a strong advocate of breastfeeding as I believe that it is the best superfood for my child and it is also the ultimate love and sacrifice a mother makes for her child when she chooses this less traveled road. It is truly a labour of love.
But one's desire, no matter how pure often clashes with reality. Sometimes I wonder if it is a test that one must pass to ensure that we do not take things for granted and to make sure that we realise how much and how badly we want something to make it happen, so that when it happens, we can feel a sense of achievement and appreciation.
After many many days of persevering through sheer hardwork (round the clock feeding and pumping), pain (nipple, breast, neck, shoulder, back pains), sweat, tears and sleep deprivation, I am proud to announce that today, Day 15, I managed to pump 4oz of milk. It is a far cry from what I went through the first few days.
You, my dear 'Sophie girl' as I call you, eat, sleep and poop a lot all day, and scream your lungs out whenever you want milk, are blooming beautifully. It is pure joy to just stare at your beautiful and delicate face and smell you everyday. Your smell is the best smell in the world. No perfume can beat your smell.
You and Josiah are my world, my pride and my joy. Honestly, having the both of you is enough. I do not foresee having a third. Both of you will always have my love, and know that I have your best interests. I love you both so much!
26/04/2013, Friday - you decided to make your grand entrance into the world. It all started the night before. There was a bit of bleeding and I felt tummy cramps and couldn't sleep. I dismissed the thought that I might go into labour because during check up with Dr N on Monday he said that you will not be born this week. However, there was "the show" on Friday morning so we decided to go see him at about 1pm after dropping Josiah at grandma's place. Imagine our surprise when Dr N told us that I was already 4cm dilated! So I was admitted into the labour room. The cardiotocograph aka CTG machine further revealed that I was already experiencing contractions though they were 10 minutes apart. Funnily, I didn't feel the contraction pain at all. I proudly announced to Daddy that I will not be needing any epidural this time. The last time I had epidural for Josiah and my labour lasted 17 hours! The epidural was really uncomfortable and I didn't think it really helped with easing the pain. Anyway, I have also been discussing with Daddy that I wanted to go sans epidural this time. After all, there are women who choose the natural route and abstain from any kind of painkiller.
Lo and behold, at about 2pm the contractions got stronger and quicker. Dr N decided to artificially break my water bag and it was not only uncomfortable but also painful. I started screaming. Dr N and Daddy suggested that I take the epidural as they didn't think I could handle the contractions which will get stronger when I approach delivery. I did not put up a fight. The contractions were really painful. I would rate it 8/10. I was already 6cm dilated. The midwife called for the anaesthesiologist to administer the epidural. Now, the epidural carries certain risks and poses some danger as the drug is injected into the spinal cord to numb the nerves from the back downwards. It must be very precise and the patient has to be very still. There is no room for error as any slip can result in paralysis. That is why I was made to sign a consent form prior to the epidural. Can you imagine how I have to endure the contraction pain and be still at the same time. But as I said, there is really no room for error. So I tried to be as still as possible. At that point of time, I was already digging into Daddy's flesh.
After the epidural and my requests to increase the dosage, the pain became somewhat bearable. At about 3pm the midwife checked my cervix and noted that I am fully dilated. She then called Dr N. Dr N arrived promptly and within a few minutes and after several pushes, you arrived at 3.16pm. We were overjoyed. Later I found out that it was a spontaneous vaginal delivery (SVD). Previously with Josiah, I had an assisted birth via vacuum. Daddy was there to witness your birth. He cut your umbilical cord. You weighed 3.1kg. Just the right size I'd say, not too big nor too small. Josiah was 2.98kg. You were so beautiful and perfect! I gave you a kiss on your cheek. The midwife then took you away to get cleaned. After about an hour later, you were brought to me to be breastfed. Your very first feed and you suckled so well! Po Po was there to see you too.
So the whole labour took about only 2 hours. I thank God for the quick and safe delivery.
Dr H then visited at about 6pm to report that you were doing fine after doing the necessary tests and routine examinations. Josiah also came to visit you but could only observe through the glass window. Everything seemed to be alright and your birth announcements were sent via sms, whatsapp and also on facebook. Daddy and Josiah were preparing to leave at about almost midnight when the nurse suddenly told Daddy that the paed on call wanted to speak to him. I felt a bit suspicious too as I was wondering why the nurses didn't bring you to me to be breastfed after the initial one at about 4pm. When Daddy returned, he told me that you turned bluish and you were breathless due to low oxygen levels. There was also mention of doing a heart examination as there is a heart murmur. In the meantime they gave you oxygen and continued monitoring your condition. Breastfeeding was out of the question as it would make you even more tired. Imagine how worried I was. This was a shock to me as Dr H had just reported that you were fine a few hours ago. I could not sleep the entire night. I also tried hand expressing colostrum/milk and then use a small syringe to suck it up so that they could give it to you through a tube. The amount that I got was so little even after an hour.
The next morning I waited for Dr H to make her rounds so that I could enquire on your condition. When she finally did her rounds, she told me that it is most likely an infection and they need to do blood tests and if need be, antibiotics to be given to you intravenously. To make matters worse, she is going on leave for a few days and another paed, Dr D will take over from her. I was puzzled as to how you could have gotten infected. Later in the day, Dr D told us that you were responding well to the antibiotics (the antibiotics is Rocephin by the way). We were reluctant to subject a newborn to antibiotics but I suppose we did not have a choice then. He also told me, to my dismay, that it is a 5 day course antibiotics and because it is given through IV, you will have to stay in the hospital until you finish the course.
There was no point for me to extend my stay, since I could not breastfeed you. I checked out of the hospital on 28/4/2014 but you had to stay until at least 1/5/2013. The IV on your hand and tube in your throat pained my heart so much. I visited you everyday for you to suckle on my breast as I had to express milk at home to keep the supply coming. Thank God your condition had also improved. You had jaundice too, so you were also given photolight treatment during your stay.
Meanwhile at home, I tried to express milk as often as possible. But it was the beginning of a very painful and sad process. No matter how hard I tried, even after 1 whole hour, I only got droplets of milk. Not even 1ml. My nipples were sore. I was so disappointed. I drank lots of fluid, black dates and ginger tea, nursing tea and various supplements but to no avail. This continued on for several days, even after you were discharged. I was on the brink of depression. I have always been a strong advocate of breastfeeding as I believe that it is the best superfood for my child and it is also the ultimate love and sacrifice a mother makes for her child when she chooses this less traveled road. It is truly a labour of love.
But one's desire, no matter how pure often clashes with reality. Sometimes I wonder if it is a test that one must pass to ensure that we do not take things for granted and to make sure that we realise how much and how badly we want something to make it happen, so that when it happens, we can feel a sense of achievement and appreciation.
After many many days of persevering through sheer hardwork (round the clock feeding and pumping), pain (nipple, breast, neck, shoulder, back pains), sweat, tears and sleep deprivation, I am proud to announce that today, Day 15, I managed to pump 4oz of milk. It is a far cry from what I went through the first few days.
You, my dear 'Sophie girl' as I call you, eat, sleep and poop a lot all day, and scream your lungs out whenever you want milk, are blooming beautifully. It is pure joy to just stare at your beautiful and delicate face and smell you everyday. Your smell is the best smell in the world. No perfume can beat your smell.
You and Josiah are my world, my pride and my joy. Honestly, having the both of you is enough. I do not foresee having a third. Both of you will always have my love, and know that I have your best interests. I love you both so much!
Monday, 15 April 2013
My little big baby girl
At almost 37 weeks, my baby girl weighs 3.033kg in utero! The doc also says that she's got a big head. I hope I will be able to push and deliver her naturally despite her big head :) Josiah's birth weight was only 2.98kg. It does not matter how big she is as long as she is healthy.
Tuesday, 9 April 2013
Dear Daughter
Dear Daughter,
You will be 36 weeks in my tummy tomorrow. Everyday I am inching closer to the day of your arrival. Mummy is beyond excited and I can't wait to see you and hold you, my little precious, in my arms soon. Your kicking is still as fitful as ever and I hope you too are excited to meet Mummy, Daddy and koko. Koko loves you and yet he is protective of Mummy. Whenever you kick Mummy, koko will say this (in a stern tone): mei mei, don't kick, be good girl! I am sure you are a good girl. Mummy loves you soo much! xoxo
You will be 36 weeks in my tummy tomorrow. Everyday I am inching closer to the day of your arrival. Mummy is beyond excited and I can't wait to see you and hold you, my little precious, in my arms soon. Your kicking is still as fitful as ever and I hope you too are excited to meet Mummy, Daddy and koko. Koko loves you and yet he is protective of Mummy. Whenever you kick Mummy, koko will say this (in a stern tone): mei mei, don't kick, be good girl! I am sure you are a good girl. Mummy loves you soo much! xoxo
Friday, 22 March 2013
Pregnancy updates
I am now 33+ weeks along, and my tummy has grown so much over the last month that it's getting uncomfortable to sleep, eat and walk (or should I say waddle). Oh, I've also stowed way my rings as they are getting too snug to fit my swelling fingers. In fact every part is swelling up: my nose, my arms, my feet, my hips, just to name a few. Not forgetting to mention the numerous trips to the bathrooms in the middle of the night. Ah...the joys of pregnancy.
On another note, baby girl has been so active especially during the nights when I am trying to go to sleep. The feeling of her moving, dancing, somersaulting, hiccuping (yes, she hiccups a lot!) in my tummy is AMAZING! Though it can be a tad painful sometimes when I feel her sudden jabs whereupon her brother will say to her: "Don't kick mama, Sophie.." My own little protector, and yes, that's the name we are planning on giving to baby girl :)
On another note, baby girl has been so active especially during the nights when I am trying to go to sleep. The feeling of her moving, dancing, somersaulting, hiccuping (yes, she hiccups a lot!) in my tummy is AMAZING! Though it can be a tad painful sometimes when I feel her sudden jabs whereupon her brother will say to her: "Don't kick mama, Sophie.." My own little protector, and yes, that's the name we are planning on giving to baby girl :)
Monday, 4 March 2013
Potty training - check!
I am so proud of Josiah. In just 3 days (of serious full on potty training mode), he has been successfully potty trained! He is able to tell when he needs to shee-shee and when he wants to pang-sai. Sometimes, a little bit of wee-wee and stool stain his pants but I am confident that with a little bit more of practice and self-control, he will be fine. Of course, he still wears diapers when we take him out and when he sleeps, but other than that, he is diaper-free. He does not even wear diapers in school and so far he has never wet himself. Here are a few pointers to potty training as a reminder to myself for future use with our baby girl :)
The key to successful potty training is that the parent/caregiver must regularly ask the child whether he needs to relieve himself. More often than not, Josiah's answer is no. But when I bring the potty to him, he wees almost every time. Secondly, have the potty nearby at all times and make sure the child can see it. This is to get him into the habit of telling when he needs to relieve himself and a reminder to him that that is the place to go to when he needs to. On the flipside, if there is no potty within range, he is most likely to wet himself because by the time you actually bring to potty to him or take him to the toilet, it would be too late. Finally, I believe that there is no point in forcing your child to sit on the potty if he is not ready. At 2.5 years old, I know that Josiah has reached a certain level of maturity where he understands the concept of wee-wee and doing big business in the potty. Instead of scolding him for still wearing diapers, I encouraged him to use the potty. Even when he wet himself on a few occasions in the past, I do not yell at him but encourage him to do it in the potty next time. No doubt it is frustrating when he wets himself and the cleaning up that follows, but when you see results, it is well worth the extra mile and patience.
The key to successful potty training is that the parent/caregiver must regularly ask the child whether he needs to relieve himself. More often than not, Josiah's answer is no. But when I bring the potty to him, he wees almost every time. Secondly, have the potty nearby at all times and make sure the child can see it. This is to get him into the habit of telling when he needs to relieve himself and a reminder to him that that is the place to go to when he needs to. On the flipside, if there is no potty within range, he is most likely to wet himself because by the time you actually bring to potty to him or take him to the toilet, it would be too late. Finally, I believe that there is no point in forcing your child to sit on the potty if he is not ready. At 2.5 years old, I know that Josiah has reached a certain level of maturity where he understands the concept of wee-wee and doing big business in the potty. Instead of scolding him for still wearing diapers, I encouraged him to use the potty. Even when he wet himself on a few occasions in the past, I do not yell at him but encourage him to do it in the potty next time. No doubt it is frustrating when he wets himself and the cleaning up that follows, but when you see results, it is well worth the extra mile and patience.
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